03 February 2013

A Dad's Guide to Postpartum Sex

Telling a man that he can't be intimate with his wife is like taking ESPN and Spike away at once. We're left with a remote but nothing to watch. Any man with children knows this feeling. The doctor comes in right after the baby is born and says no sex for at least six weeks. At that particular time it doesn't seem unreasonable, but four weeks later it may seem like an eternity.

Here's some things to keep in mind:
1. Don't rush your partner. You should wait for her to become comfortable with having sex again. Although she may be willing to give in to your advances if she is rushed she may resent your actions.
2. Six weeks is just a guideline. This number depends on how well the recovery process goes. Remember that women who have complications or a Cesarean have a much longer recovery period. Mothers who suffer from postpartum depression will also need more time.
3. Nature will not always provide the normal amount of lubrication necessary after birth. Plan accordingly.
4. A little action is better than none at all, don't make her overdo it.
5. Remember although it may seem like your love life will never return to normal, it will this is just a temporary speed bump.

Let mom take the lead on this one. If she needs to slow down, let her. It may feel frustrating but in the long run she'll be happier, which in turn means so will you.
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  1. I think after our son was born, we were too busy and emotionally flustered all the time to have sex. That's got to be the roughest time in your life, right after a kid's born. It's hard on the marriage, hard on finances and hard on moms and dads individually. It's hard to get a hard on.

  2. I would have to agree with you on having those type of feelings the first two times.....as for the third, well things were different. According to the midwife that we worked with, she sees a lot of couples that can't even wait the six weeks which definitely surprised me. 

    Thanks for the read, it means a lot from a heavyweight like you.

  3. Geez, no need to make fun of my weight.

  4. LOL. If I was going to make fun of something it would be that robe....